Need vs. want.

Quantity vs. quality.

I have realized that no matter how many items or people I have in my life, there are the few favorites that I truly rely upon.  I have chosen my favorite sweatpants, my most comfortable pair of jeans, my softest hoodie, and my brightest Nike kicks (notice there is no mention of business clothes)…I have picked out my favorite earrings, my most versatile flip-flops, and my most breathable summer dress.  There are many days when I can’t settle on anything in my closet and I mindlessly throw on my favorites for ease or a confidence boost.

The same principle goes for people.  There are millions of humans in this world, but for each of us there is someone out there who knows us better than we know ourselves.  This is what we should hope to find and sustain – an amazing friendship; one great love; the extreme beauty in loyalty, trust, faith, and simplicity.  Why do we constantly search for more if we have already found what we need?

Do we want variety?  Search for intriguing and complex, rather than one-dimensional.

Do we want to prove our success to others?  Search inward, not outward.

As you simplify your life, the laws of the universe will be simpler; solitude will not be solitude, poverty will not be poverty, nor weakness weakness. ~ Henry David Thoreau

It is obvious that only having one shirt or one pair of pants is both unrealistic and unhygienic, but this idea of simplicity forces us to reevaluate our purchasing habits and life choices.  I have moved apartments an average of once a year for way too many years, so simplicity has been forced upon me.  I have narrowed my closet, thought twice about every purchase, and as a result have a thicker wallet (minus all of my graphic design tuition bills) and guilt-free mind.  It has also reminded me to focus on the importance of the amazing friendships I have developed, and to make an effort to stay connected regardless of where I have settled down.

Possessions, outward success, publicity, luxury…to me these have always been contemptible. I believe that a simple and unassuming manner of life is best for everyone, best for both the body and the mind. ~ Albert Einstein

With all of that said, I can always do with more travel.  I have consciously decided that will be my one splurge.  But I challenge you to simplify your life.  Daily practice will reduce the clutter and noise.  You will find…well…a simple peace.

Outshine, outlast, outperform.  The race is always on.  It pushes us to be better.

But all sports have a timeout, a halftime, a seventh-inning stretch, or some other way for the athletes to temporarily recover and regain their focus.  This is something that I didn’t realize applied to my life until now, and what I believe is a key point in regaining my motivation.  I might have the greatest intention to always be the top performer, but without taking a water break and refocusing my efforts, the rewards could be dismal.

Knowing when to fight and knowing when to recover are equally as important.  As a full-time employee and a full-time student, my goal for the next couple of months is to learn how to take a half hour a day to completely relax and reboot.  If time is made for recovery, going after what you want should no longer feel like a race, but a journey that has the aura and excitement of tackling your dreams.

My 30 minutes will be filled with simple luxuries: taking a bath, enjoying a green smoothie (yum) or a glass of red wine, turning off all of the distractions, lighting a candle, saying a prayer.  These are easily achievable, yet highly satisfying…and may just give me the edge I need.

Most of us are over-caffeinated and exhausted because of our good intentions of trying to keep up with the world’s crazy pace.  It may be time to turn off the social media, put down the Starbucks cup, and reflect on how we can become more efficient in our efforts.

And if you follow my lead and consequently find yourself enjoying this down time way too much, watch this video and I promise your drive to achieve will return with a vengeance.

Go get what is yours.

1) There is nothing better (welllll almost) than an amazing plate of spaghetti and meatballs, and nothing worse than a plate of spaghetti and meatballs with not enough SAUCE.

2) Why isn’t there a website where you can buy one of everything?  All those times you lost one sock, one earring, one shoe, one glove, or the times when you break a plate, bleach a towel, or whatever other random catastrophes happen in life…it would be great to have a ONE stop shop so I could complete my mismatched pairs.  I know socks come in threes these days (ridiculous), so why can’t we just purchase one?

3) MUST bring more food to work on the days I workout in the mornings.  This will result in not cleaning out the vending machines in the 3 surrounding counties by 5:00 pm.

4) Why is there braille located on drive-through ATMs?

5) Once I have kids I will have themed dinners at least once a week.  I can hear myself now…”You are not allowed to come down those stairs and eat unless you are dressed as a dinosaur.”  Hmm at what age does that stop though…don’t want them hating Halloween!  And what if they don’t like what is for dinner – could this backfire?  Need to think this through further…

6) Women’s-cut athletic gear does NOT fit my body.  Are there girls out there who can actually wear the weird flared t-shirts with the awkwardly cut sleeves?  Just give me a regular t-shirt and I promise I won’t complain. #tomboyproblems

7) Does anyone still prank people?  I could use some more of that in my life.

8) I think the measure of how fit you are should be whether you can fit through your car door when it is only open to the first stopping point.  Every time I park too close to a car and can only open my door that far I think “Ahhh yes I still got it!” and most likely feel way more accomplished than I should.

9) Am I the only one who still cuts up bananas to put in my Cheerios?

10) For those of you living in DC: Why is there not a plate made specifically for Jumbo Slice pizza?!  Is it just so that the slice looks even more monstrous as it spans across two paper plates?  This idea is a gold mine in my opinion.

11) 8- hour work days are completely ridiculous to me.  Who came up with this random number and why does it define all of our lives?  Let me do my work and then get on with my life rather than thinking I am productive for 8 hours in a row every single day!

12) Why don’t we have an Era Store?  The departments could be named the 20s, 30s, etc. with obviously the 80s as the biggest department in the center.  That way when you want neon spandex or a scrunchy, you don’t have to look in 15 different locations!

13) Timing is everything.  I know this is a cliché but it has been so true for every part of my life.  I always have a grand plan of where my life is going the next 5 years, and God continuously laughs at me.  I have come to the realization that he has a larger and much more clear view of my entire plan, and if changes don’t happen when I think they should, most likely something better is in store.

14) Everyone’s definition of beautiful is different.  It makes me start to wonder if people perceive other things the same way…  What if the way an orange tastes to me is completely different from the way it tastes to you…how would we know?  My mind is blown as I continue to think of the possibilities.

15) Your career doesn’t define you.  Your character and moral integrity does.  We need to stop putting so much emphasis on our jobs, breathe deeply, and let the stress pass.  I let my work leak too much into my personal life.  Holding a door for a stranger or smiling is much more productive.

I think 15 will do for now.  All random comments welcome (now you know you aren’t the only one who thinks random thoughts).

Why not revert back to those feelings to stretch yourself further in 2013? Instead of the typical ‘eat better and work out more’ resolution that tends to last a few weeks, go beyond an internal resolution and reach out to someone who is more in need.

Join me on February 2nd at the Mason Inn in Washington DC for the ‘give your heART to a child‘ fundraiser for the nonprofit, Family & Youth Initiative (DCFYI), which discovers permanent families for young adults in foster care in the DC area. I have organized this event because I know that without a stable family during my childhood, I would not have the emotional, spiritual, intellectual (I could go on forever) foundation for my future. A permanent home is something that a child wants, and more importantly, DESERVES.

The fundraiser is not just any other ordinary night. I have invited two former NFL players to speak and perform on behalf of the children, two additional singers to perform live, a jewelry designer, urban fashion designer, two graffiti artists (one of which will paint live on an awesome spinning canvas), and a chocolatier. If that isn’t enough, we also have an open bar and appetizers available.

This event happens to take place right before Valentine’s Day so it is a perfect opportunity to purchase a unique present from a well-known local DC artist, which will help the local art community and the foster children in need. Step up your game in 2013 and start your year by having a blast at the Mason Inn for a fantastic cause!

Purchase tickets at the bottom of DCFYI’s webpage or make a donation here.

(If you can’t attend my event or don’t have the money right now to donate – I challenge you to go out and volunteer at a nonprofit in your own neighborhood. I guarantee it will give you the lift you need and truly make a difference in someone else’s life.)

A new year brings a youthful hope of accomplishing dreams and leaving behind bad habits.

Just as the film makers in the video below challenged the limits of the camera, I dare you to challenge the limits of whatever is holding you back: lack of mental toughness, lack of faith, your boss, a few pounds gained, a family member lost, frustation with the world… leave it in the dust and make this the best year yet.

Don’t make a resolution, make a life change. Use your past to make you better, not bitter.

I am going to test the limits of my career and my education. I will stop blaming others and challenge myself this year to train in various areas to become more valuable in my project management role, and dominate my video production classes to create films that will make a difference in the world.

Change is powerful. Inspire others to do the same.

I woke up at 4:45 am to work out and took a moment to commend myself on the dedication I have had every day since I was young to stay fit and proud of my physique.

I took a moment after my workout to thank God for my job security, my safety, my freedom and wondered why that wasn’t enough in this present moment…

For the past couple of years in my career I have felt underutilized with a constant desire to do more. My creativity is harnessed, my leadership is stifled, my confidence shook. I have not had the guts to truly admit to myself that the big name company and consulting job that was once my dream is no longer a long-term goal. Granted, I have had many fortunate opportunities along the way, but is this really where I was meant to be / meant to do? Should I constantly feel this knot in my stomach yearning for a creative outlet?

I have ideas upon ideas upon ideas. I keep a notebook at my desk and jot down the multitude of new company ideas that come to me daily. Do I need to wait another year to finish school to start changing my life for the better? What is stopping me from accomplishing my goals? Fear.

Fear of failure? Fear of leaving the well-known corporate world? Fear of judgement?

The only fear that constantly resides inside of me is that I will wake up in 20 years and regret that I never pursued my true passion. …Instead of creating my own path, I mindlessly walked down the paths of others.

Life is short. I have the most respect for those who are happy pursuing what they love. Bread will always find a way to the table with hard work and determination.

I have never settled for mediocrity, forever striving to stay at the top of the pack. I won’t let mediocrity finally catch up to me now.

It is our light not our darkness that most frightens us
Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.
Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.
It is our light not our darkness that most frightens us.

We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous,
talented and fabulous?

Actually, who are you not to be?
You are a child of God.
Your playing small does not serve the world.
There’s nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other
people won’t feel insecure around you.

We were born to make manifest the glory of
God that is within us.

It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone.

And as we let our own light shine,
we unconsciously give other people
permission to do the same.

As we are liberated from our own fear,
Our presence automatically liberates others.

—Marianne Williamson

As Albert Einstein says, Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.  Well, for this workout, although it is insane, the results are real.

I didn’t have a goal when I first started the workout program.  I had actually purchased the program months ago after taking a poll of athletes: Insanity vs. P90X, and right before the program arrived boot camp slammed me with a back injury, leaving the discs to gather dust.  With my injury subsiding, I felt like I was in an exercise funk and wanted a new challenge to reinvigorate my desire to reach my prior college fitness level.  

For those of you unfamiliar to the program, they have you take a fitness test on Day 1.  After 2 weeks you repeat the fitness tests to measure your improvement.  I increased anywhere from 10% to 47% on each selected exercise after only 14 days!  Granted I had a performance number I wanted to beat from Day 1 which makes the results somewhat skewed, but I couldn’t believe how fast the program was helping me improve, especially because I considered myself to already be in good shape. 

I am now on week 3 of the program and hope to make it to Day 60 without quitting.  As I learned from playing soccer, there are days when your legs are completely shot or you don’t have the mental strength to push yourself beyond your comfort zone, but as you get stronger those days get fewer and far between.  I have faith that I can keep grinding every day, watch my diet more closely (more kale and quinoa, but c’mon, chocolate definitely stays), and hope the results speak for themselves on and off the field.

If you have seen How I Met Your Mother recently, you know how trivial a stamp of approval can be…so take it or leave it, Insanity has been approved by a former D1 collegiate soccer player as it almost rivals our college conditioning program (and my teammates will gladly attest to how insane that really was).  But, then again, I am a 27 year-old who just spent 2 hours last night building a Santa out of legos, so trust whatever opinion you want.

Happy sweating!

To be honest…these do nothing but stress me out.  So instead of heading to the mall and getting stampeded by lunatic moms, or furiously clicking my mouse to only find out every item I want is backordered, I have decided to simply share the websites that I think are beyond awesome.  This is where I get ridiculously stunning presents on normal days…like Wednesday.

Fab - It is the equivalent of an artsy, innovative LivingSocial/Groupon.  Signing up is beyond worth it…they have around 20 – 25 new companies every day showcasing genius products!

Uncommon Goods - Just as the name describes, these gifts are anything but ordinary.  This site continues to update its inventory with awesome items for anyone in the family – including Uncle Jim and Grandma.

Tipsy Wine Glasses…you already have a friend in mind don’t you?

Noisebot - For those people who are really hard to buy for and seem to only wear t-shirts and hoodies – this site if for you.  (And if you want to get me one as well I won’t complain.)

Already a proud owner.

This is my next purchase.

CRNCHY – Although you can’t buy directly from this website, it has mind-blowing new gadgets and designs that are the hottest of the hot topics of the day.

A robotic system that has a mounted paintball gun! (Just don’t forget that this could come back to haunt you.)

Decide – A website that tells you what to buy and when to buy it.  As a member you even get a lowest price guarantee.  Take that Black Friday.

They even give you a Decide Score!

I just realized that I gave away my all of my current shopping secrets…so now I must go on a mission to find even more impressive stuff.  Challenge accepted.

How much time does it take to regain this trust?  Once trust is regained, is there an ability to trust more than what you once did?  I have only given my trust to a very select few in my life, and it isn’t because I don’t think more are trustworthy, I just believe that trust should be one of the hardest things to earn in life.  It is about honor, respect, faith, and love.

Trust is more evident as the holidays turn the corner.  Strangers reach out for a helping hand; charity donations and food drives are plastered on every telephone pole and Internet site.  Trust isn’t only between two people…it can simply be trusting in your brakes as you make your way down a steep hill.  Trust and faith are quite frequently synonymous.

Below are some pictures that seem to display a deep trust between the subjects.  Sometimes you don’t have a choice whether to trust or not, and sometimes trust isn’t obvious to every observer.

It wasn’t until I laid down my commitments on paper until I realized why my brain couldn’t shut off even when I tried to sleep at night…

1) My daytime job as a Government Contractor.  We all know by now that this is not my dream career because even though the pay is good, I feel more unsatisfied with my role as the days go on…which is why I could not be happier they approved me to work 80% part-time, down from a full time position (which really isn’t all that different).

2) My part-time night job as a Videographer and Social Media Marketer for a cycling studio.  This evolved from a need to use my inner creativity and find somewhere to build my film portfolio.  Creating and directing videos for the studio to place on YouTube, and finding materials for Pinterest, Instagram, and Tumblr takes up more time than one would initially think!

3) School.  This is the initial reason why I went part-time at my Contracting firm.  A little thing called class and filming projects takes more than a couple hours of my day as I pursue a Video Production degree.

4) Coaching.  I am obsessed with being a soccer coach to little kids, but I am somewhat relieved there is a break during the winter holidays so I don’t have to constantly rush to the fields right after work.

5) Playing soccer.  I. Will. Never. Give. This. Up.  Until my knees and back finally give out.

6) Volunteering.  In my free time (ha) I am putting together a large fundraiser for a nonprofit dedicated to helping young adults in foster care find adoptive families.  This doesn’t feel like work at all, but involves meeting with the founders, vendors, food/drink donators, and writing a million emails to coordinate the bands, 5 artists, and 2 former NFL players to attract a large crowd and raise a significant amount of money.

7) Attending studio filmings/building my portfolio…blogging…my social life…boyfriend.

I am sure there are a few things I left out…but I have now realized I do not know how to simply say “No” to people.  You have heard of a little saying called Quantity vs. Quality.  I am too proud to say that my quality isn’t affected in all of these activities, but I could probably score another goal or two in my games if I got an extra hour of sleep…

I am in the middle of switching careers so I feel the pressure to say yes to everything.  A small opportunity could lead to something big.  At least that’s what they say, right?  I have found that networking is invaluable.  Yes, I have heard it a thousand times, but honestly one conversation has opened multiple doors for me.  It is all about just making one phone call – reaching out to a peer when it may be slightly uncomfortable.  Comfort never got me anywhere, except in trouble with an entire bag of Famous Amos.

How much is too much?  A multitude of new opportunities…does it lead to stomach ulcers or finally landing that dream job?  Hard to tell. 

I have promised myself I would not take on another activity until I have crossed off a few from my list.  I need to find some time to sit down, drink a cup of tea, listen to some amazing 80s music (or terrible 90s music), and watch some football and futbol.  Luckily I haven’t committed to taking my crazy amount of activities and piecing them together into some sort of life direction – I can leave that up to the Big Guy.